Sunday, September 7, 2008

DEFENSES DOWN (OSI)

This pair of haikus, one serious and one silly, were both inspired by my friend Sydney. The first was written in response to the photo she sent me of her backyard this spring. The second was inspired by a book she gave me for my birthday, “Haiku Humor – Wit and Folly in Japanese Poems and Prints.” That one put me in the mood for some goofiness. That plus I come from a family of inveterate punners.



look at my bare heart
its defenses fallen like
white cherry blossoms










heavy rain for days
I can see defenses down
de bridge's out, too














For more words and images on today's prompt, visit One Single Impression
Road photo by D. Godin,
during the flood of ’05, near Millarville, Alberta

24 comments:

zoya gautam said...

..both are wonderful-and delicate..thanks for sharing this..

Poetikat said...

Very nice. I love "de bridge's out" - sort of Jamaican patois.

A few weeks back, I came across a book of poetry by Mao Tse Tung - considering who he was and what he represented, his poetry was charming and delicate. Very odd.

Kat

me ann my camera said...

The while is lovely but does its bareness suggest the heart is now void of colour? Beautiful picture.

Lirone said...

Lovely, particularly the first one!

Sue said...

The first poem is lovely, but I think I like the humor of the second one best.

Sylvia K said...

They are both beautiful, the first almost fragile and the second inspired a big giggle.

fourwindshaiga said...

Both are good, but I love that second one.
What a lovely patio garden.

susan said...

Hi Deborah,

My first visit;glad I came by. I like both your entries.

By the way,I'm a native Detoriter, too and I have family in Ontario and Alberta.

Thanks for reading and commenting at BES.

spacedlaw said...

The "bridge out" bit summoned images of "back in 10 minutes" signs...
Thanks for the chuckle.

Kathiesbirds said...

Tenderness and humor, what a combo! You've caught me with my defenses down and I am smiling!

Jim said...

Hi Deborha, your first poem? Been there done that.
I'm a little slow so I had to back up again to the second verse of the first for a better meaning. It was literal (minus a space)!
..

Sian said...

Oh Deborah, I wanted to do sumting bout de fences too but my 'ku just didn't gel, I am so glad yours did.
:o)

anthonynorth said...

Very different, but both enjoyable.

Regina Clare Jane said...

Oh, hee hee- the last one was fun! And I liked the first as well- poignant, your heart bare like the cherry tree...

Quiet Paths said...

That first one sounds so profoundly Japanese. It's just beautiful and so well crafted.

SandyCarlson said...

Both are wonderful because they take me right into the world you describe. Being humorous requires dropping defenses....I find I often forget that.

Raven said...

Ya gotta love a good pun. Well done! These are both great.

karen crone said...

I'm a sucker for cherry blossoms.
Liked them both.
Thanks! Karen

Julie said...

The second one is fun and raises a grin on this old face.

The first one is very sad: the heart is bare even with defences down. Sad.

Beth said...

Deborah--
You're right--the second one was such a fun play on words like the one that flew out of my fingers for this prompt!

The interesting thing about being bare of cherry blossoms is that the heart of the tree already has plans for the fruit and growth and vitality. It's like the blossoms are the messengers, the harbingers, but they are only that...respectfully hopeing your bare heart knows this!

tumblewords said...

Indeed, the second one is a riotously funny piece and the first one is the finest haiku!

kouji said...

lovely. the thought of defenses like cherry blossoms.

Patois said...

Oh, very funny that second. How wonderful to come from such a family.

barbs.haiku said...

I love them both! The fallen blossoms are lovely and a bit sad. But then your seconds picks me right back up!